If you’re someone who’s maintained ties with your childhood friends, you’re part of a unique group.
Maintaining these lifelong friendships can be a roller-coaster of shared memories, laughter, and sometimes, inevitable disagreements. It can be a comforting yet complex aspect of your life.
The ability to sustain these relationships isn’t just about making time for catch-ups or reminiscing about the old times. It’s more than that. And it’s not something everyone can do.
Psychology has some insights into this. There are eight distinct qualities that individuals who keep in touch with their childhood friends tend to share.
1) They have a strong sense of empathy
If you’ve managed to maintain a strong bond with your childhood friends, you’re likely to be someone with a high degree of empathy.
Empathy isn’t just about understanding another person’s feelings. It also involves responding to these feelings in a thoughtful, caring way.
For instance, when your childhood friend shares about a difficult situation they’re going through, you don’t just listen. You feel their pain and try to provide comfort in any possible way.
Maintaining friendships from childhood until adulthood requires understanding, patience, and a lot of emotional support.
These relationships have seen ups and downs, shared secrets, witnessed transformations, and survived disagreements.
In all these scenarios, empathy is the key quality that helps you navigate through the emotional complexities that come along.
By being empathetic, you’re not only strengthening your bond with your childhood friend but also enriching your own emotional wellbeing.
This mutual exchange of understanding and compassion is what keeps these friendships alive and thriving over the years.
2) They embrace change
One might think that those who cling to childhood friendships are resistant to change, stuck in the past, or unable to move on.
Quite the contrary, these individuals are often more comfortable with change than others.
Growing up entails numerous transformations – educational pursuits, career changes, moving cities, or starting families. All these transitions can dramatically alter a person’s lifestyle and perspective.
People who maintain their childhood friendships are those who have learned to adapt and grow with their friends through these life changes.
They understand that change is an integral part of life and that it doesn’t have to mean the end of their friendship.
Instead of letting these changes create distance, they use them as opportunities to learn more about each other and deepen their bond.
They appreciate the shared history but also respect and celebrate the people they have become.
3) They have a high emotional intelligence
Emotional intelligence is the ability to understand and manage your own emotions, as well as those of others.
It’s about being aware of what you’re feeling, why you’re feeling that way, and how your emotions can affect others.
Those who keep in touch with their childhood friends often score high on emotional intelligence. They are adept at recognizing their own emotions and those of their friends.
They know when to give advice, when to simply listen, or when to give their friend some space.
This emotional awareness makes them excellent communicators. They can express their feelings clearly and also interpret subtle emotional cues from their friends.
This level of understanding is crucial in maintaining long-term relationships.
Furthermore, research has found a positive correlation between emotional intelligence and interpersonal relations. In other words, the higher your emotional intelligence, the better your relationships tend to be.
So, if you’re someone who has managed to keep your childhood friends close, you likely possess this valuable quality.
4) They are generous with their time and energy
Time is one of the most precious gifts we have to give, and those who maintain lifelong friendships understand this deeply.
They are generous with their time, willing to set aside their own needs to be there for their friends.
Whether it’s a late-night phone call to discuss a problem or showing up to support them at important life events, they make themselves available.
They understand that their presence, even if it’s just over the phone or through a text message, can make a world of difference to their friend.
This generosity extends beyond just time.
They’re also giving with their energy, often going out of their way to help their friends, whether it’s helping them move house or providing emotional support during tough times.
People who maintain their childhood friends know that friendship requires effort and commitment, and they’re willing to invest in it.
5) They appreciate the comfort of shared history
There’s something special about having someone in your life who knew you when you had braces, or when you were figuring out your fashion sense during those awkward teenage years.
Someone who was there during your first heartbreak or who witnessed all your highs and lows.
Those who keep in touch with their childhood friends deeply appreciate this shared history.
They find comfort in the fact that there’s someone who knows them – not just the adult version of them, but the kid they used to be.
They don’t need to explain their past or their family dynamics. Their friend already knows and understands. It’s like having a living, breathing diary that can laugh, cry and reminisce with you.
6) They understand the value of forgiveness
We all make mistakes. I remember a childhood friend with whom I lost touch after we started hanging out with different people.
Our paths drifted apart as we got older and met new friends, but after 25 years, we reconnected—thanks to an Instagram story.
That simple post sparked a conversation, and before we knew it, our friendship was rekindled, as if no time had passed.
People who keep their childhood friends understand the importance of forgiveness and letting go of the past.
They know that holding onto grudges or resentment only poisons relationships. Instead, they make space for mistakes, realizing that no one is perfect.
In this case, reconnecting showed us that our friendship was still meaningful and that shared history is worth preserving.
Forgiveness and the ability to let go are essential for maintaining long-term connections.
7) They are brutally honest
Honesty is the backbone of any lasting relationship, and childhood friendships are no exception.
Those who keep these friendships alive are often unafraid to tell it like it is, even when the truth might sting.
If your childhood friend sees you making a harmful decision, they won’t just stand by and watch. They’ll step in, voice their concerns, and tell you things you might not want to hear but need to.
They respect you enough to trust that your friendship can withstand the truth. They value the relationship too much to let you go down a harmful path without at least trying to guide you back.
This kind of honesty might be hard to swallow at times, but it’s also a sign of deep love and respect.
It shows that they care about you as a person, not just about keeping the peace or maintaining a facade of perfection.
8) They prioritize their friendships
One of the most crucial qualities shared by people who keep in touch with their childhood friends is that they prioritize these relationships.
They don’t allow the busyness of life to push these friendships to the back burner.
They understand that maintaining these bonds requires effort and time. They make regular catch-ups a part of their routine, whether it’s a quick phone call or an annual meet-up.
They check in on each other, remember important dates, and show up when needed.
By prioritizing their friendships, they ensure that these bonds continue to grow and evolve, just as they do.
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