8 types of people who can be incredibly difficult to live with

Anyone who’s ever had a roommate or shared a home knows that living with others isn’t always easy.

While some quirks are harmless, certain personality types can make cohabitation feel downright exhausting.

Maybe you’ve dealt with a roommate who never cleans up or a partner who insists on constant perfection. These challenging habits can make living together a struggle.

Let’s dive into eight types of people who can be especially tough to live with and how to cope with their quirks.

1) The perpetual mess-maker

Living with other people requires a certain level of respect for shared spaces. And nothing infringes on that respect quite like a perpetual mess-maker.

We all know the type. They leave their dishes in the sink for days, their clothes scattered around the house, and don’t even get me started on the bathroom!

You might find yourself constantly cleaning up after them, turning your home into a never-ending battleground of clutter.

This kind of person can be incredibly difficult to live with because their lack of tidiness often feels like a disregard for those around them. It’s one thing to have a messy personal space, but when that mess spills over into communal areas, it can create tension and conflict.

So if you’re living with a perpetual mess-maker, buckle up. It might be a bumpy ride!

2) The night owl

If you’re anything like me, a good night’s sleep is essential. But living with a night owl? That can seriously disrupt your slumber.

I once shared a flat with a guy who thought 2 am was the perfect time to start cooking, blasting music, or having lengthy phone conversations. I’d be lying in bed, trying to catch some sleep before my 8 am shift the next morning while he was just starting his day… at night!

The constant noise, the lights flickering on and off, and the general lack of consideration for those of us who function during daylight hours made living with him an incredibly difficult experience.

Night owls can be great folks, but when their nocturnal habits start affecting your sleep, it can turn peaceful cohabitation into a nightmare.

3) The chronic complainer

Living with someone who constantly complains can be a real drain on your energy and mood. They seem to find fault in everything, from the weather to the taste of tap water.

Their negativity can slowly seep into your own outlook, making your home feel less like a sanctuary and more like a battleground. You get more anxiety, stress, and lower life satisfaction.

What’s more, according to research, it can actually damage your brain, as it literally peels away the neurons in the hippocampus (where problem-solving happens).

So if you find yourself living with a chronic complainer, bear in mind that their negativity isn’t just annoying – it could be affecting your mental health as well.

4) The drama king or queen

Living with someone who thrives on drama can often feel like you’re sharing a house with a reality TV show. There’s always some sort of conflict brewing, a crisis to attend to, or an emotional whirlwind to navigate.

Whether it’s a heated argument over a minor issue or an overblown reaction to something relatively insignificant, the drama king or queen has a knack for turning the mundane into the melodramatic.

While it may be entertaining at first, the constant tension and heightened emotions can become exhausting. It’s hard to relax in your own home when you’re always bracing yourself for the next dramatic episode.

5) The silent sufferer

Sometimes, the most difficult people to live with aren’t the ones who make a lot of noise, but those who suffer in silence. They’re the ones who bottle up their feelings, never expressing when they’re upset or unhappy about something.

Living with a silent sufferer can be emotionally taxing. You might constantly worry about what they’re feeling, or whether they’re upset with you.

The uncertainty can create an atmosphere of tension and anxiety, making it difficult to feel at ease in your own home.

It’s important to remember that everyone deserves to live in a space where they feel seen, heard, and understood. If you’re living with a silent sufferer, it might be worth opening up a conversation about how you can better communicate with each other.

After all, home should be a place where everyone feels comfortable expressing themselves.

6) The control freak

Have you ever lived with someone who needs to have everything just so? They have a specific place for everything, a particular way of doing things, and woe betide anyone who doesn’t adhere to their system.

I’ve been there. There were times I’d come home to find my books rearranged because they weren’t “alphabetized correctly”, or my laundry refolded because it wasn’t “neat enough”.

Well, let me tell you, living under such strict rules can make you feel like a guest in your own home, rather than an equal occupant.

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While it’s important to respect shared spaces and the preferences of those you live with, it’s equally important to remember that everyone should feel comfortable and free to be themselves at home.

Finding the balance can be tricky, but it’s key to peaceful cohabitation.

7) The boundary crosser

It goes without saying that living with someone often requires establishing certain boundaries for the sake of everyone’s comfort. But what happens when you live with someone who constantly crosses those boundaries?

Maybe they use your things without asking, constantly invade your privacy, or simply disregard the personal space you’ve clearly defined.

This blatant disregard for boundaries can make living together incredibly difficult, not to mention frustrating.

Everyone has a right to their own space and privacy, even when living with others. If you’re dealing with a boundary crosser, it might be time for a frank conversation about respect and personal space.

8) The non-contributor

Finally, let’s talk about how living with others is a team effort. Everyone needs to pitch in, whether that means doing their part of the cleaning, contributing to household expenses, or helping to maintain a peaceful and respectful living environment.

And if you live with someone who doesn’t pull their weight…well, it just feels heavier, doesn’t it?

The non-contributor is someone who seems to think that these responsibilities don’t apply to them. They leave all the housework to others, neglect their financial obligations, and generally take more from the household than they give.

This creates an unfair burden on the rest of the household and can lead to resentment and conflict.

If you’re living with someone who doesn’t pitch in, it’s worth considering the impact this has on your well-being and whether it’s time to have a heart-to-heart—or even rethink the arrangement entirely.

Final thoughts

Living with others isn’t just about managing difficult personalities or navigating conflicts. It’s about learning to understand each other’s perspectives, acknowledging our differences, and finding common ground.

At the end of the day, we’re all just trying to make our way in the world with the tools we have. Remembering this can help turn shared living from a battle into an opportunity for growth and understanding.

So the next time you find yourself frustrated with a housemate’s quirks or habits, take a moment to step into their shoes. You might find that empathy is the most powerful tool in your cohabitation toolkit.

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Picture of Lucas Graham

Lucas Graham

Lucas Graham, based in Auckland, writes about the psychology behind everyday decisions and life choices. His perspective is grounded in the belief that understanding oneself is the key to better decision-making. Lucas’s articles are a mix of personal anecdotes and observations, offering readers relatable and down-to-earth advice.

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