Some people have a way of carrying themselves with class and sophistication, while others… well, not so much. And often, it comes down to the words they use.
The way we speak can reveal a lot about us—our confidence, our emotional intelligence, and even our level of social awareness. But here’s the thing: many people who lack class and sophistication don’t even realize how they come across.
They use certain phrases that make them seem rude, insecure, or unaware of social norms. And according to psychology, these phrases can leave a lasting impression—just not the kind you’d want.
If you want to avoid sounding unrefined without realizing it, here are nine phrases to watch out for.
1) I’m just being honest
Some people think that as long as they say “I’m just being honest,” they can say whatever they want without consequences. But in reality, this phrase is often used as an excuse for being rude or tactless.
Honesty is important, but there’s a big difference between being truthful and being blunt to the point of hurting others. People with class know how to express their opinions without putting others down.
Psychologists call this “brutal honesty bias”—the tendency to believe that as long as something is true, it doesn’t matter how it’s said. But the truth is, how you say something matters just as much as what you say.
If you find yourself using this phrase often, it might be worth asking: Are you really just being honest, or are you using honesty as a shield for unnecessary harshness?
2) No offense, but…
I used to have a coworker who started almost every criticism with “No offense, but…”—as if that somehow made whatever came next okay. Spoiler: it didn’t.
One time, after I gave a presentation at work, she turned to me and said, “No offense, but that was kind of all over the place.” It stung. Not because I couldn’t handle feedback, but because she wasn’t actually giving constructive criticism—she was just being dismissive.
Psychologists call this a “disclaimer phrase.” It’s something people say to soften the blow of an insult or harsh opinion. But here’s the thing: it rarely works. Instead of making a comment sound less offensive, it actually signals that something rude is coming.
People with class don’t need to hide behind phrases like this. They know how to give feedback in a way that’s respectful and helpful—without pretending that saying “no offense” cancels out whatever comes next.
3) I’m not like other people
People who say “I’m not like other people” often think they’re setting themselves apart in a good way. But more often than not, this phrase comes across as arrogant or even insecure.
Psychologists have studied a phenomenon called the “false uniqueness effect,” where people tend to overestimate how special or different they really are. In reality, most of us share more similarities with others than we realize.
Instead of trying to prove how different they are, people with class focus on being authentic without needing to announce it. After all, if you truly stand out, others will notice—no need to say it out loud.
4) Do you know who I am?
Few phrases make someone seem more entitled than “Do you know who I am?” It’s often used by people who feel they deserve special treatment, whether at a restaurant, an event, or in a disagreement.
This kind of behavior is linked to what psychologists call the “entitlement mentality”—the belief that one deserves more privileges or recognition than others. But instead of making someone seem important, it usually has the opposite effect, making them look desperate for validation.
Truly sophisticated people don’t need to demand respect—they earn it through their actions, not their words.
5) Whatever, I don’t care
Dismissing a conversation with “Whatever, I don’t care” doesn’t make someone look cool or indifferent—it makes them seem immature and unwilling to engage.
Psychologists refer to this as “defensive avoidance,” where people shut down discussions to protect their ego or avoid uncomfortable emotions. Instead of addressing the issue or expressing their true feelings, they act like nothing matters.
People with class and sophistication know how to communicate—even when they disagree. They don’t need to pretend they don’t care; they know how to handle conversations with maturity and respect.
6) I’m just keeping it real
There’s nothing wrong with being genuine, but too often, “I’m just keeping it real” is used as an excuse for being harsh, dismissive, or even cruel.
Honesty without kindness isn’t a virtue—it’s a lack of emotional intelligence. Words have power, and the way we say things can either build people up or tear them down. True sophistication isn’t about sugarcoating the truth, but about knowing when and how to express it in a way that respects others.
The most refined people understand that you don’t have to be harsh to be honest. You can speak the truth while still being thoughtful—and that’s what really sets them apart.
7) If I were you…
It’s easy to say, “If I were you…” when giving advice, but the truth is, no one can fully understand what another person is going through.
There was a time when I thought offering advice like this was helpful—like I was giving someone a shortcut to the right decision. But I’ve learned that most people don’t need someone to tell them what they would do; they need someone to listen, to understand, and to support them in figuring out their own path.
People with true class and sophistication don’t assume they have all the answers. Instead of saying, “If I were you,” they ask, “What do you think would be best?” Because at the end of the day, the best advice often comes from within.
8) That’s just the way I am
Saying “That’s just the way I am” might sound like confidence, but in reality, it’s often just an excuse to avoid growth or self-reflection.
Psychologists call this a “fixed mindset”—the belief that personality and behavior are set in stone. But the truth is, no one is born with perfect social skills, emotional intelligence, or self-awareness. These things take effort and a willingness to change.
People with class don’t hide behind this phrase. They recognize that personal growth is a lifelong process, and instead of resisting change, they embrace it. Because being sophisticated isn’t about being perfect—it’s about always striving to be better.
9) I don’t have time for this
Dismissing someone with “I don’t have time for this” doesn’t make a person look busy or important—it makes them look dismissive and disrespectful.
Everyone has responsibilities, stress, and obligations. But class isn’t about how much time you have; it’s about how you treat others, even in moments of frustration.
People with true sophistication understand that respect is never a waste of time.
Bottom line: words shape perception
The way we speak doesn’t just reflect who we are—it shapes how others see us. Every word we choose sends a message, not just about what we think, but about the kind of person we are.
Psychologists have long studied the impact of language on social perception. Studies suggest that people who communicate with warmth, respect, and emotional intelligence are more likely to be seen as competent and trustworthy. On the other hand, dismissive or abrasive language can create distance, even when that’s not the intention.
Class and sophistication aren’t about using fancy words or putting on an act—they come from self-awareness and the ability to navigate social interactions with grace. And sometimes, the smallest shift in language can make the biggest difference in how we connect with others.
