Keeping a close relationship with your adult children is no easy feat. It’s an art that involves a delicate balance of communication, understanding, and respect.
These parents aren’t just good at staying connected with their kids. They’re also exceptional at maintaining a unique bond that evolves as their children grow into adulthood.
In this article, you’ll find 9 common behaviors displayed by parents who maintain a strong bond with their adult children. Intrigued? Stick around to learn these valuable habits and perhaps even adopt them into your own parenting style.
1) Open communication is key
In any relationship, communication is paramount. This is especially true in the parent-child dynamic.
Parents who maintain close ties with their adult children aren’t shy about expressing their thoughts and feelings. They understand the importance of keeping the lines of communication open, and they make it a point to talk with their children regularly.
These parents aren’t just speaking at their children. They’re also excellent listeners. They give their children the space to voice their own thoughts, feelings, and concerns.
Through this two-way dialogue, they foster a sense of mutual respect and understanding. It’s not about controlling or directing their adult children’s lives, but rather about being there to provide guidance when needed.
Maintaining open communication isn’t always easy. It takes effort, patience, and a willingness to understand differing viewpoints. But the reward—a strong bond with your adult child—is well worth it.
2) Respecting boundaries
This one hits close to home for me. As a parent of two adult children, I’ve learned that respecting their independence and personal space is crucial.
In my early years as an empty-nester, I found it challenging not to interfere too much in my children’s lives. The desire to help, advise, and sometimes even control was strong.
But I realized that my children were adults now, with their own lives, decisions, and mistakes to make. So, I took a step back. I started asking before offering advice. I respected their decisions even when I didn’t agree with them.
I learned to knock before entering their personal space—both literally and metaphorically.
By recognizing and respecting these boundaries, I found that my adult children were more willing to come to me for advice or simply share about their day. It was a small change in my behavior that made a huge difference in our relationship.
Respect is a two-way street, and by giving it generously, we receive it in return—strengthening the bond between us.
3) Encouraging independence
While it may seem counterintuitive, encouraging independence is actually a key behavior of parents who maintain close relationships with their adult children.
These parents understand that their role isn’t to solve their adult children’s problems. Instead, they’re there to provide guidance and emotional support while allowing their children to navigate life’s challenges on their own.
It’s about striking the right balance. It’s not about stepping back entirely, but it’s also not about stepping in every time there’s a problem. It’s about fostering a sense of independence while also being there as a supportive safety net when needed. This delicate balance helps to cultivate a strong, lasting bond between parents and their adult children.
4) Staying involved and interested
Parents who maintain close relationships with their adult children make a point of staying involved and showing genuine interest in their lives.
This doesn’t mean they’re overbearing or intrusive. Instead, they take the time to ask about their children’s day, their work, their hobbies, and their friendships. They listen attentively and engage in meaningful conversations about their adult children’s experiences.
Staying involved also means being there for the significant moments—celebrating achievements, providing comfort during tough times, and being a source of unwavering support.
By showing a genuine interest in their adult children’s lives, these parents communicate a powerful message: “I care about you, and I’m here for you no matter what.” This level of involvement and interest fosters a sense of trust and strengthens the bond between parent and child.
5) Showing unconditional love
Unconditional love is a cornerstone of any strong parent-child relationship, regardless of age. Parents who maintain close relationships with their adult children are experts at demonstrating this kind of love.
They show their love not just through words, but also through actions. They’re there for their children in good times and bad, offering support and understanding without judgment.
These parents understand that their adult children will make mistakes. And when they do, these parents are there to offer guidance and help them learn from these experiences rather than criticizing or expressing disappointment.
Unconditional love doesn’t mean agreeing on everything or ignoring wrongdoings. It means loving and accepting your child for who they are, celebrating their individuality, and being there to guide them as they navigate their own path in life. This foundation of unconditional love fosters a deep bond that can weather any storm.
6) Embracing change
Life is a journey of constant change, and this journey doesn’t stop when children become adults.
Parents who stay incredibly close to their adult children understand this. They recognize that as their children grow and evolve, so too must their relationship.
They are not holding onto the memory of the child their son or daughter once was, but rather celebrating the adult they have become. They adapt, evolve, and grow together with their children, embracing the changes that come with each new chapter.
This acceptance creates a safe space for adult children to express themselves freely and authentically. It sends a message that they are loved and valued not just for who they were, but for who they are becoming.
This heartfelt embrace of change serves to strengthen the bond between parent and child, creating a relationship that is not rooted in the past, but blossoming in the present.
7) Practicing forgiveness
No relationship is perfect, and the parent-child dynamic is no exception. Misunderstandings happen. Words are exchanged. Feelings get hurt.
I remember a particular incident with my daughter a few years back. We had a major disagreement over a decision she’d made. Both of us said things we didn’t mean, and it resulted in a painful falling out.
It took some time, honest conversations, and a lot of tears for us to start mending our relationship. But the key to our reconciliation was forgiveness.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting or condoning the wrongs. It means accepting that we’re all human, we all make mistakes, and we all deserve a second chance.
By practicing forgiveness, we were able to heal our relationship and reinforce the bond between us. It showed us that even in the face of conflict, our love for each other was unwavering and strong.
8) Showing appreciation
In the hustle and bustle of daily life, it’s easy to overlook the little things. But parents who maintain close relationships with their adult children understand the power of appreciation.
They don’t take their children for granted. They express gratitude for their children’s achievements, for their efforts, and even for their mere presence in their lives.
This appreciation isn’t just about big, grand gestures. It’s often in the small, everyday moments—thanking their child for a thoughtful act, acknowledging their hard work, or simply expressing how proud they are.
By showing appreciation regularly, these parents reinforce their love and respect for their adult children. This creates a positive, nurturing environment that strengthens their bond and fosters mutual respect.
9) Prioritizing the relationship
At the heart of it all, parents who stay incredibly close to their adult children make this relationship a priority.
They devote time, energy, and emotional investment to maintaining this bond. They’re proactive in reaching out, staying connected, and making sure their children know they’re always there for them.
This commitment to prioritizing the relationship sends a clear message to their adult children: “You matter to me.” It’s a powerful affirmation that strengthens the bond and keeps it strong over time.
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