Understanding emotions can be a labyrinth, especially when it comes to men.
As a relationship expert and the founder of the Love Connection blog, I’ve noticed that some men often avoid discussing their feelings and emotions.
The reasons behind this behavior can vary, but it’s often due to societal norms or personal discomfort. Regardless, this avoidance often manifests in other behaviors.
Now, these men might not even realize they’re doing it. And that’s where this article comes in.
I’m going to share with you 7 typical behaviors that men who shy away from discussing their feelings often display without even realizing it.
Let’s dive in!
1) Closed body language
Body language is like an unspoken language, revealing what the person might not be saying verbally.
For men who are uncomfortable discussing their feelings, the first telltale sign is often their body language.
It’s as if their bodies are trying to protect them from the vulnerability that comes with sharing emotions.
You’ll notice that they tend to have a closed body language.
Their arms might be folded, or they may lean away when emotions enter the conversation. They may also avoid eye contact, choosing instead to focus their gaze elsewhere.
This isn’t something that men consciously do.
It’s an automatic response, a physical manifestation of their discomfort with emotional discussions.
Body language is nuanced. Not every man who folds his arms is avoiding emotional discussions.
But if this behavior is frequently coupled with other signs on this list, it can be a strong indicator of emotional avoidance.
2) Regularly changing the subject
Have you ever been in a conversation with a man and noticed how he subtly steers the discussion away from emotions and feelings?
This might be more common than you think.
As a relationship expert, I often notice men who are uncomfortable with emotions will frequently switch topics. Particularly, they shift away from anything that might require them to express their emotions.
If someone consistently avoids emotional discussions, there’s a possibility they’re not being entirely truthful about their feelings.
3) Overemphasis on logical reasoning
It’s not uncommon for men who aren’t comfortable discussing their feelings to lean heavily on logic and reasoning.
They might dismiss emotions as irrational or unnecessary, preferring to stick to facts and figures.
In my book, Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship, I discuss how this over-reliance on logical reasoning can create a barrier to emotional connection.
It’s an attempt to keep things on a surface level and avoid delving into the deeper, messier realm of emotions.
But here’s the thing: Emotions aren’t irrational. They’re a natural part of being human. They provide valuable insights into our needs, desires, and fears.
By disregarding them, we’re missing out on a crucial aspect of our existence.
If you notice a man consistently pushing away emotional discussions in favor of logical reasoning, it might be time to bring this to his attention.
4) Extreme focus on the needs of others
Men who shy away from discussing their feelings might overcompensate by prioritizing the emotions and needs of others.
It’s a clever way to steer clear of their own emotional landscape. By focusing on others, they manage to divert attention away from themselves.
While this might make them seem like the most empathetic person in the room, it’s important to remember that empathy should not be an escape route from personal feelings.
After all, understanding and expressing our own emotions is crucial to fostering healthy relationships.
So if you see a man consistently putting others’ needs before his own, without ever touching on his own feelings, it could be a sign that he’s avoiding emotional discussions.
5) Difficulty with emotional vocabulary
As someone who’s spent years studying relationships and human behavior, I’ve noticed that men who avoid discussing their feelings often struggle with emotional vocabulary.
It’s not that they don’t have feelings. They do, just like everyone else. The problem lies in articulating these emotions.
They might use generic terms like “I’m fine” or “I’m okay” instead of expressing what they’re truly feeling.
This difficulty with emotional vocabulary isn’t something they do intentionally. More often than not, it’s because they haven’t had enough practice or encouragement to express their feelings openly.
6) Internalizing stress and worries
Let’s get real for a moment. Men who shy away from discussing their feelings often end up shouldering a heavy emotional burden.
They internalize their stress and worries, keeping it all to themselves.
This can be incredibly exhausting. Pretending everything is okay when it’s not, carrying around a weight of unexpressed emotions day after day.
It’s like walking around with an invisible backpack filled with rocks.
The problem is, this isn’t sustainable. No one can carry such a burden indefinitely without it affecting their mental and physical health.
If you notice that a man in your life is constantly stressed or worried but never talks about what’s bothering him, it could be a sign that he’s internalizing his emotions.
In such cases, it’s important to remind him that it’s okay to share his burden, to talk about his feelings. After all, we’re all human, and it’s okay to need help sometimes.
7) Tendency to isolate during emotional turmoil
In my years of experience as a relationship expert, I’ve observed that men who struggle with expressing their feelings often prefer solitude when they’re dealing with emotional turmoil.
Instead of reaching out for support, they retreat into their shell.
This behavior might be fueled by the belief that ‘real men’ handle their problems on their own.
Isolation can sometimes amplify the emotional turmoil, making it even harder to cope.
Offering a supportive presence can go a long way in helping them open up. It’s crucial to create an environment where they feel safe to express their emotions.
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