Building solid, meaningful connections can feel like trying to tame a wild beast. You know it’s possible, you’ve seen others do it, but whenever you try, it seems to bite back.
You’ve attended every networking event, every social gathering, read every book on communication skills and still, it seems like your connections are just not as strong as they could be.
I’ve been there too, stuck in the cycle of shallow friendships and flimsy connections. Until I realized that the secret wasn’t in the number of events I attended or the amount of small talk I mastered, but in some simple social habits that I had overlooked.
You’ve probably heard the saying that it’s not what you know, but who you know. Well, I’d like to debunk that and say it’s not just about who you know, it’s about how well you know them and how well they know you.
This article is your roadmap to stronger connections than 95% of the population. Think of this as your personal cheat sheet to building relationships that are deep, meaningful and truly rewarding.
It’s about understanding the social habits that make a difference, those small changes that can turn your interactions from superficial to supercharged.
Ready to dive in? Let’s get started on these eight social habits of people who build stronger connections than 95% of the population.
1) They take genuine interest in other people
We’ve all been in conversations where we can tell the other person is just waiting for their turn to speak. It’s a frustrating feeling and definitely doesn’t create a strong connection.
People who build stronger connections than 95% of the population flip this on its head. They take a genuine interest in what the other person is saying. They ask follow-up questions, they show empathy, and they really listen.
This isn’t about being nosy or prying into someone’s private life. It’s about showing that you value their thoughts, opinions and experiences. It’s about creating a safe space where the other person feels heard and understood.
When you show a genuine interest in others, you’re not just another face in the crowd. You become someone they connect with on a deeper level, someone they remember and want to keep in touch with.
So next time you’re in a conversation, try to really engage. Show that you’re interested and invested in what the other person is saying.
You might be surprised at how much of an impact this can make on your connections.
2) They are present in the moment
In a world where we’re constantly bombarded with distractions, being present in the moment is a skill that sets apart those who make stronger connections.
When you’re fully engaged in the moment, it sends a powerful message to the other person that they are important and what they say matters.
I’ll never forget a dinner I had with a dear friend of mine. She had just been promoted and wanted to celebrate her achievement.
As we were sitting at our favorite Italian restaurant, I found my mind wandering to an email I had received earlier about an upcoming deadline. I was nodding along to her stories about work, but I wasn’t really there.
Suddenly, she stopped talking and looked at me. “You’re not here with me,” she said. It was a wake-up call. I realized that by not being present, I was sending the message that her achievement didn’t matter to me.
From that day forward, I made a conscious effort to be present in my interactions with others.
Whether it’s a casual conversation or a deep heart-to-heart talk, being present shows that you value the person you’re with and the time you’re spending together.
It’s one of the key habits that people who build stronger connections than 95% of the population consistently practice.
3) They practice empathy
Maya Angelou once said, “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
This quote resonates deeply with me and is a perfect match for this point.
People who build stronger connections than 95% of the population have a knack for empathy. They put themselves in other people’s shoes and try to understand their feelings and perspectives.
This empathetic approach helps to build trust and mutual understanding, which are key to forming strong and lasting connections.
For instance, imagine you’re talking to a friend who’s going through a tough time.
Instead of rushing to offer advice or solutions, try to really understand what they’re feeling. Let them know that it’s okay to feel the way they do and that you’re there for them.
This simple act of understanding and validation can go a long way in strengthening your connection with them.
Practicing empathy is not just about being kind, it’s about recognizing the humanity in others and connecting with them on a deeper level.
4) They express gratitude
Research has shown that expressing gratitude has a powerful impact on our relationships. It’s not just about saying “thank you” for a favor or a gift. It’s about acknowledging the value and worth of the other person.
When you express gratitude, you’re telling the other person that you don’t take them for granted.
You’re letting them know that you appreciate their time, effort, and presence in your life. This can foster a sense of warmth and mutual respect, which are fundamental to building strong connections.
Let’s say a colleague helps you out with a difficult project at work.
Instead of just saying “thanks”, tell them specifically what you’re grateful for. “I really appreciate your help with the project. Your expertise really made a difference.”
This kind of specific, heartfelt gratitude can make the other person feel valued and appreciated, strengthening your connection with them.
In the world where people who build stronger connections than 95% of the population thrive, gratitude is the currency.
5) They are authentic
In a world where we often feel pressured to put on a perfect façade, authenticity stands out like a lighthouse in the fog.
People who build stronger connections aren’t afraid to be their genuine selves. They understand that authenticity breeds trust and realness in relationships.
It’s pretty simple really – people connect with people, not with perfectly curated personas. Pretending to be someone you’re not or hiding your true feelings and thoughts isn’t conducive to deep, meaningful connections.
Being authentic doesn’t mean oversharing or being brutally honest all the time. It’s about being true to your values, expressing your feelings genuinely, and not being afraid to show vulnerability.
I’ve found that when I let my guard down and show my true self, people respond positively. They feel more comfortable opening up and being authentic in return, paving the way for stronger connections.
After all, connection is about understanding and accepting each other, warts and all.
6) They are open-minded
Open-mindedness is a trait that’s often overlooked, but it’s a key habit of those who build stronger connections than most.
Being open-minded means being willing to consider different ideas, perspectives, and experiences. It’s about being curious and eager to learn from others, even when their viewpoints differ from your own.
We all come from different backgrounds and have different experiences, which shape our views of the world. By being open-minded, you acknowledge this diversity and use it to enrich your own understanding and broaden your horizons.
Let’s say a friend shares a perspective that’s completely different from yours. Instead of dismissing it outright, try to understand where they’re coming from. Ask questions, show interest, and engage in a meaningful discussion.
This not only helps to deepen your connection with the other person but also fosters mutual respect and understanding.
It shows that you value their opinion and are willing to learn from them, which can greatly enhance the strength of your connections.
7) They are dependable
Trust is the bedrock of any strong connection. And one surefire way to earn trust is by being dependable.
Those who build stronger connections than most understand the importance of following through on their words with actions.
Being dependable isn’t just about being there for the big moments, but also showing up for the small ones. It’s about keeping your promises, even when it’s not convenient.
Consider a scenario where a friend shares a secret with you and asks you to keep it confidential. By doing so, you’re proving your dependability and earning their trust, which strengthens your connection.
Dependable people are like anchors in our lives. They provide stability and reassurance, making us feel secure in our relationship with them.
By being dependable, you’re sending a clear message that the other person can count on you, and this fosters a stronger bond between you two.
8) They practice active listening
Listening is an art. And those who master it have one of the most powerful tools for building stronger connections.
It’s not just about being silent while the other person talks, it’s about being engaged and showing that you’re genuinely interested in understanding their point of view.
Active listening involves giving feedback, asking relevant questions, and avoiding distractions while the other person is speaking. It’s about valuing their words and acknowledging their feelings.
Imagine you’re having a conversation with a friend who’s going through a tough time. Instead of just hearing their words, try to understand the emotions behind them.
Respond with empathy and validation, showing them that you truly understand and care about their feelings.
By practicing active listening, you’re building a bridge of understanding between you and the other person. This fosters a sense of trust and mutual respect, which are crucial for strong and lasting connections.
In essence, active listening is more than just a habit – it’s the cornerstone of deep, meaningful connections. The people who build stronger connections aren’t just good talkers, they’re exceptional listeners.
Wrapping it up
Building stronger connections doesn’t have to feel like an uphill battle. It’s not about grand gestures or lofty speeches, but rather about the simple, everyday habits that we often overlook.
As you’ve journeyed with me through these eight habits, you may have realized that they’re not just about building connections. They’re about becoming a better person for ourselves and for those around us.
The essence of it all is that it’s a journey of self-improvement. And just like any journey, there will be bumps along the way.
But remember what American author James Baldwin once said: “Not everything that is faced can be changed. But nothing can be changed until it is faced.”
So face these habits head-on. Embrace them. Practice them. In doing so, you’ll not only build stronger connections than 95% of the population but also pave the way for personal growth and self-improvement.
And as you do this, always keep in mind that the best connection you can ever build is with yourself. So while you’re out there strengthening your relationships with others, don’t forget to nurture the one with yourself.
With these habits in your arsenal, you’re well on your way to building connections that are not just strong, but deep and meaningful. Connections that enrich your life and those around you.
So here’s to stronger connections and a better you. Happy connecting!
