If you want to be happier as you get older, say goodbye to these 10 habits

Growing older comes with its own set of challenges, but it doesn’t mean we can’t strive for happiness. One thing’s for sure, certain habits can hamper our joy as we age.

It’s all about choice. Hanging onto these habits is like clinging to a raft that’s slowly sinking, when a sturdy ship is within reach.

Saying goodbye to these ten habits isn’t about forcing change, but guiding yourself towards a happier, more fulfilling life as you age.

In this article, I’ll share the ten habits you might want to consider parting ways with if you aim for a brighter and happier future.

Let’s get started.

1) Hanging onto grudges

As we get older, we accumulate more life experiences, and unfortunately, some of these experiences can be negative.

It’s easy to hold onto grudges. Someone may have hurt us deeply, and it can feel like letting go of the grudge would be letting them off the hook.

But the truth is, holding onto a grudge isn’t punishing the person who hurt you as much as it’s punishing yourself. It can lead to chronic stress, which has been linked to numerous health issues.

Letting go of grudges isn’t about forgetting what happened or condoning harmful actions. It’s about choosing to focus on the present and the future, rather than being held back by the past.

Saying goodbye to grudges doesn’t mean you have to forget what happened or even reconcile with the person. It just means choosing not to let past hurt control your present happiness.

This might be challenging, but releasing these grudges can be incredibly liberating and pave the way for more joy as you age.

2) Neglecting self-care

I remember a time when I was so caught up in my work and taking care of others that I completely neglected my own needs. I was burned out, stressed, and honestly, pretty miserable.

The turning point came when my health started to decline. I was constantly tired, had trouble sleeping, and just felt out of sorts.

That’s when I realized that taking care of yourself isn’t a luxury or a sign of selfishness – it’s a necessity. If we don’t take care of ourselves, we can’t effectively take care of others or perform at our best.

So, I started to prioritize self-care. This meant setting boundaries at work, taking time each day for exercise or relaxation, and making sure to eat nutritious meals.

And you know what? It made a huge difference. I felt healthier, happier, and more capable of handling life’s challenges.

As we get older, self-care becomes even more crucial. So if you’re in the habit of putting everyone else’s needs before your own, it may be time to say goodbye to that habit and start prioritizing your own wellbeing.

3) Saying yes to everything

The word ‘no’ can be a powerful tool for preserving our mental health and creating boundaries. However, many of us fear using it, assuming that it will lead to missed opportunities or disappointment from others.

In a study by the University of California in San Francisco, it was found that the more difficulty you have saying no, the more likely you are to experience stress, burnout, and even depression.

Understanding the power of saying no can be transformative. It doesnโ€™t mean you’re being difficult or selfish. Rather, you’re valuing your time and emotional wellbeing.

As we age, our energy levels and priorities change. Learning to say no to things that don’t align with our values or bring us joy is an important step towards maintaining happiness in later life.

4) Comparing yourself to others

In this age of social media, it’s easier than ever to fall into the trap of comparing ourselves to others. We see their highlight reels – the vacations, the accomplishments, the perfectly curated lives – and we feel inadequate in comparison.

But the truth is, everyone has their own struggles and challenges. What we see online is rarely an accurate representation of someone’s life.

Constantly comparing yourself to others can rob you of your joy and prevent you from appreciating your own accomplishments.

5) Ignoring your passions

Over the years, it’s easy to let our passions take a backseat to responsibilities like work, family, and other commitments. But ignoring what truly makes us happy can lead to a life of regret and dissatisfaction.

Reconnecting with your passions, or even discovering new ones, can bring a sense of joy and purpose into your life. It could be painting, gardening, learning a new language, or any activity that fills you with excitement.

These passions can become an essential part of maintaining our happiness and zest for life. 

6) Not expressing gratitude

In the hustle and bustle of life, it’s easy to overlook the blessings we have. We often focus on what’s missing or what could be better, forgetting to appreciate what’s already there.

Expressing gratitude can shift our focus from what’s wrong in our lives to what’s right. It reminds us of the abundance we often take for granted – the roof over our heads, the food on our tables, the loved ones in our lives.

As we get older, the importance of gratitude becomes more evident. It can transform ordinary days into moments of joy and appreciation.

7) Avoiding difficult conversations

I used to avoid tough conversations like the plague. I was afraid of confrontation, of upsetting others, or of revealing my true feelings. But by doing so, I was also denying myself the opportunity for growth and genuine connection.

One day, a misunderstanding led to a falling out with a close friend. Instead of sweeping it under the rug, we decided to have an open and honest conversation about our feelings.

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It was uncomfortable and even painful at times. But it also led to a deeper understanding and respect for each other. The experience taught me that difficult conversations are not to be feared but embraced.

Avoiding them may seem easier in the short term, but over time it can lead to resentment and a lack of fulfillment.

8) Always chasing perfection

We often equate perfection with success and happiness. We strive for the perfect job, the perfect home, the perfect relationship. But in reality, this ceaseless quest for perfection can be a significant roadblock to our happiness.

Perfection is an illusion. It’s unattainable and can lead to unnecessary stress and dissatisfaction. Instead of striving for perfection, aim for progress. Celebrate your achievements, however small they may be.

It’s our imperfections that make us human and unique. Embrace them. They are a part of who you are and contribute to your personal growth. The beauty of life lies in its imperfections, so let’s celebrate them instead of chasing an unattainable ideal.

9) Resisting change

Change is inevitable. From minor shifts in our daily routine to major life transitions, change is a constant part of life. Yet, many of us resist it because it takes us out of our comfort zone.

Instead of resisting change, learning to embrace it can significantly boost our happiness. Change often brings new opportunities, new experiences, and new lessons that can enrich our lives.

If you’re in the habit of resisting change, consider saying goodbye to this habit and embracing the exciting possibilities that come with change.

10) Not living in the present

The present moment is all we truly have. Yet, we spend so much time dwelling on the past or worrying about the future that we forget to live in the now.

Living in the present means fully experiencing each moment as it comes. It’s about appreciating the here and now, instead of constantly longing for something else or somewhere else.

As we age, the importance of living in the present becomes more apparent. Each moment is precious and can never be relived. By fully embracing the present, we can find more joy and fulfillment in our daily lives. 

The essence: Happiness is within your control

The power of happiness as we age often lies in our hands. It’s embedded in the choices we make, the habits we foster, and the ones we decide to let go.

According to a Harvard study, happiness is less about material wealth and more about our relationships, our attitude towards life, and how we spend our time.

It’s about saying goodbye to habits that no longer serve us and embracing those that enhance our well-being. It’s about living in the present, expressing gratitude, letting go of grudges, and doing things that genuinely bring us joy.

As we journey through life, let’s remember that cultivating happiness is not an end goal but a continuous process. And it’s often the small steps we take towards this process that make the most significant difference.

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Picture of Tina Fey

Tina Fey

I've ridden the rails, gone off track and lost my train of thought. I'm writing to try and find it again. Hope you enjoy the journey with me.

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