If you recognize these 9 signs, you’re more selfless than the average person

I’ll admit, selflessness is one of those traits we often take for granted, even in ourselves.

Most of us do small acts of kindness without a second thought, not realizing that putting others first, without expecting anything in return, is something rare.

It’s more than just a habit; it’s a way of living, a quiet grace that doesn’t call attention to itself.

In this article, I’ll walk you through nine signs that might reveal you’re more selfless than you realize.

If you see a bit of yourself in these traits, give yourself a little credit. You might just be one of those rare souls who makes the world better simply by being in it.

1) You’re always putting others first

Selflessness starts with the act of prioritizing others before yourself.

When faced with a situation, your first instinct is to consider how it might affect those around you. You make decisions based on the well-being and comfort of others, often placing their needs above your own.

This might mean offering the last slice of pizza to a friend, even when you’re still hungry, or giving up your seat on the bus for someone who needs it more.

This doesn’t mean you’re a pushover; it just denotes a deep-seated compassion for others. You recognize that every action has a ripple effect and you choose to make those ripples positive for those around you.

Just keep in mind: being selfless requires finding a balance between caring for others and also caring for yourself.

2) You find joy in helping others

If there’s one thing I’ve noticed about myself, it’s that I feel genuinely happy when I’m able to help someone.

It doesn’t matter if it’s a big gesture or a small act of kindness – the joy I get is the same.

For instance, last week, my neighbor was struggling to bring in her groceries, and I immediately offered to help. The smile on her face and the heartfelt thanks she gave me filled me with a warmth that lasted the rest of the day.

In fact, experts claim that the secret to happiness is helping others. Having experienced this myself, I couldn’t agree more.

This kind of happiness that comes from helping others doesn’t come from a place of seeking validation or praise. It comes from knowing that you’ve made someone’s day a little bit better and perhaps even inspired them to pay that kindness forward.

If this resonates with you, it’s a strong sign that you’re more selfless than the average person.

3) You’re empathetic

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others.

It’s a vital component of being selfless, as it requires you to step outside of your own experiences and imagine someone else’s perspective.

Did you know that empathy is actually hardwired into our brains? Neuroscientists have discovered “mirror neurons” that fire both when we perform an action and when we observe someone else perform the same action.

This neurological mimicry allows us to “feel” the emotions of others, effectively putting ourselves in their shoes.

So, if you find yourself naturally understanding and sharing the emotions of those around you, then you’re demonstrating a key trait of selflessness.

Being able to empathize with others means you can anticipate their needs and act accordingly, even if it means putting their needs above your own.

4) You practice active listening

Active listening is more than just hearing the words someone says.

It’s an effort to truly understand their thoughts, feelings, and opinions. You’re not just waiting for your turn to speak; you’re truly engaged in what they’re saying.

If you’re the person who friends turn to when they need someone to talk to, it’s likely because you’re an active listener.

You make them feel heard and understood, which is a fundamental aspect of being selfless.

You value their words, respond with empathy, and offer support or advice when it’s appropriate. This selfless act of giving your time and attention makes a significant difference in people’s lives.

If this describes you, then you’re showing another sign of being more selfless than the average person.

5) You’re not looking for recognition

One of the most telling signs of a selfless person is their indifference towards recognition or praise.

They don’t help others with the expectation of being rewarded or acknowledged.

For you, the act of giving or helping is reward enough. You don’t need a thank you or a pat on the back to feel fulfilled.

You find satisfaction in knowing that you’ve made a positive impact on someone’s life.

This humility and lack of desire for acclaim is a clear indicator of selflessness. If you can relate to this, it’s another sign that you’re more selfless than the average person.

6) You believe in the power of kindness

Kindness is a language that the deaf can hear and the blind can see – a sentiment that resonates deeply with selfless individuals.

You firmly believe in the transformative power of kindness.

You understand that a small act of kindness can have a profound impact on someone’s life. You know that it’s the everyday, consistent acts of goodwill that truly matter.

Being kind to others, even when it’s inconvenient or challenging, is a testament to your selflessness.

If you find yourself consistently choosing kindness, even when it might be easier not to, you’re demonstrating another key characteristic of selflessness.

7) You forgive easily

I’ve always found that harboring grudges or holding on to anger only weighs me down. It’s like carrying a heavy backpack that keeps getting heavier – it drains my energy and robs me of joy.

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I remember a time when a close friend betrayed my trust.

It hurt deeply, but I realized that holding onto that pain wasn’t going to help me move forward. So, I chose to forgive.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting or condoning the wrong done to you. You’re simply freeing yourself from the burden of resentment and pain.

If you’re able to forgive easily and choose peace over conflict, it shows a level of selflessness that is truly admirable.

8) You’re patient

Patience is a virtue, and it’s one that selfless people often possess.

You understand that good things take time, and you’re willing to wait.

Whether it’s standing in a long queue without complaining, or giving someone the time they need to make a decision without pressuring them – your patience shines through.

Patience demonstrates a level of self-control and understanding that’s closely tied with selflessness. You’re able to put your own desires on hold and prioritize the comfort of others.

If this sounds like you, it’s another sign of being more selfless than the average person.

9) You’re genuinely happy for others

One of the most beautiful aspects of selflessness is the ability to feel genuine happiness for others, even when their success or joy has nothing to do with you.

You celebrate their achievements, share in their joy, and feel their happiness as if it were your own.

You don’t view life as a competition but rather as a journey that everyone is navigating in their own way.

This ability to be genuinely happy for others without a hint of envy or resentment is perhaps the most telling sign of true selflessness.

Final thoughts

At the heart of selflessness lies strength—a kind of giving that doesn’t demand anything back.

Kahlil Gibran once wrote, “You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.”

And maybe that’s what real selflessness looks like: giving from the core of who you are, without waiting for recognition or applause.

If these signs resonate with you, then know that your kindness leaves a mark, even in ways you might never see.

Keep being patient, forgiving, and quietly generous. Every act of selflessness, no matter how small, sends ripples that reach far beyond your own life.

Because the world needs people like you—people who lift others up, simply because it’s in their nature to do so.

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Lucas Graham

Lucas Graham, based in Auckland, writes about the psychology behind everyday decisions and life choices. His perspective is grounded in the belief that understanding oneself is the key to better decision-making. Lucas’s articles are a mix of personal anecdotes and observations, offering readers relatable and down-to-earth advice.

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