As humans, we are undoubtedly shaped by our childhood experiences. How we were raised, the environment we grew up in, and the values that were instilled in us play a significant role in defining who we are as adults.
One aspect of upbringing that can have a profound impact is being sheltered. This term generally refers to children who were excessively protected from potential harms or dangers, or even everyday life experiences.
This overprotection can sometimes lead to a unique set of behaviors when these individuals reach adulthood.
Psychology suggests that there are nine common characteristics that may be apparent in adults who were overly sheltered as children.
In this article, “People who were sheltered as a child usually display these 9 behaviors later in life, says psychology”, we will delve into these traits and shed light on how a sheltered upbringing can impact an individual’s adult life.
1) Difficulty with decision-making
One of the most noticeable traits in adults who were sheltered as children is their struggle with decision-making. This isn’t always apparent, sometimes it takes a while to notice.
Often, they’ve had most decisions made for them throughout their childhood, limiting their opportunities to learn how to make choices independently.
You might notice these individuals frequently second-guessing themselves, or constantly seeking approval or validation before making even small decisions.
Perhaps they become excessively stressed when confronted with various options, or they may often rely on others to make decisions for them.
In some cases, they may avoid making any decisions at all, preferring to let life happen rather than taking control of their own destiny.
This difficulty with decision-making is a common characteristic of adults who were overly sheltered during their childhood.
2) Over-reliance on authority figures
Another behavior commonly observed in adults who had a sheltered upbringing is the tendency to overly rely on authority figures.
This can manifest in different ways.
They may often look to figures of authority such as bosses, teachers, or even parents for guidance and reassurance.
They might constantly seek approval from these individuals before moving forward with any plans or decisions.
In their workplace, they might struggle with taking initiatives or challenging the status quo, out of fear of upsetting their superiors.
They might also have a hard time standing up for themselves when they feel they are being treated unfairly.
This tendency to over-rely on authority figures can be traced back to their sheltered upbringing where parents or guardians were the main decision-makers, leaving them with little room for self-reliance.
3) High levels of independence
While it might seem paradoxical, some individuals who were heavily sheltered as children exhibit high levels of independence in their adult life.
Having been protected from the world for so long, they might feel a strong drive to prove their self-sufficiency once they’re out on their own.
They may go out of their way to avoid asking for help, even when they need it.
These individuals may take on all responsibilities, often pushing themselves to the brink of exhaustion to ensure everything is done perfectly. They may resist delegating tasks and insist on handling everything themselves.
This behavior can stem from a desire to break free from the confines of their sheltered upbringing and demonstrate that they are capable of standing on their own two feet.
4) Fear of confrontation
It’s not easy to admit, but many adults who were sheltered as children carry a deep-seated fear of confrontation. This fear can be paralyzing and often affects their personal and professional relationships.
They might go to great lengths to avoid any form of conflict, even if it means suppressing their own feelings or needs. They may often agree with others, even when they don’t truly align with what’s being said or done, just to keep the peace.
They might struggle to voice their opinions, particularly if they anticipate disagreement. This fear can sometimes lead them to be passive-aggressive, expressing their discontentment or anger indirectly rather than addressing issues head-on.
This fear of confrontation can be traced back to their sheltered upbringing where any form of dissent might have been discouraged or punished, leaving them ill-equipped to handle conflicts in a healthy manner later in life.
5) Emotional sensitivity
Adults who were sheltered as children often display a high level of emotional sensitivity. This isn’t a weakness or something to be dismissed, but rather a unique trait that deserves understanding and empathy.
These individuals might be deeply affected by the emotions and moods of others, often going out of their way to ensure those around them are comfortable and happy. They may take things to heart more than most, and feel emotions intensely.
They might struggle to cope with criticism, even if it’s constructive, and can often feel overwhelmed by negative emotions. At the same time, their emotional sensitivity can make them incredibly empathetic and attuned to the feelings of others.
This emotional sensitivity is likely a product of their sheltered upbringing where they were protected from harsh realities, leaving them more vulnerable to emotional upheavals in their adult life.
6) Struggle with uncertainty
Isn’t life uncertain? We all grapple with uncertainty from time to time. However, for adults who were sheltered as children, the struggle can be more intense.
These individuals might find it difficult to cope with unpredictable situations.
They may crave stability and predictability, and might feel anxious or stressed when faced with unexpected changes or unplanned events.
Whether it’s a sudden change in plans, a surprise party, or an impromptu decision, these scenarios can trigger feelings of unease and discomfort.
This struggle is often a result of their sheltered upbringing where their environment was controlled and predictable, leaving them unprepared for the uncertainties that are part and parcel of adult life.
7) Love for rules and routines
Who doesn’t enjoy a bit of order in their life? But for adults who were sheltered as children, the love for rules and routines can be on another level.
You might notice these individuals have a knack for creating schedules, maintaining routines, and sticking to plans.
They might feel a sense of comfort in knowing what’s going to happen next, and when.
They could be the friends who always arrive on time, the colleagues who never miss a deadline, or the partners who enjoy planning every detail of the vacation.
This preference for structure can be traced back to their sheltered upbringing where their days were often meticulously planned, leaving them with a fondness for order and predictability in their adult life.
8) Lack of real-world knowledge
Let’s face it, being sheltered as a child can leave you somewhat unprepared for the realities of the adult world.
And that’s okay, it’s not your fault, but it is something you need to acknowledge and work on.
Adults who were overly protected in their formative years may find themselves lacking in basic real-world knowledge.
This could range from practical skills like cooking, doing laundry, or budgeting, to understanding social cues or navigating public transportation.
Often, these gaps in knowledge aren’t due to a lack of intelligence, but simply because they were never exposed to these experiences growing up.
It’s essential for these individuals to recognize this deficiency and take steps to learn and grow. After all, life is about constant learning and adapting, regardless of where we’re starting from.
9) Resilience and adaptability
If there’s one thing you should remember, it’s this: being sheltered as a child does not define you. Yes, it might have shaped you in certain ways, but the beauty of being human is our capacity for change and growth.
Sure, adults who were sheltered often face unique challenges. However, they also possess an incredible ability for resilience and adaptability. They have the capacity to learn from their experiences and evolve.
Whether it’s learning new life skills, managing emotions, or confronting fears, these individuals can and do make significant strides in overcoming the effects of their sheltered upbringing.
This resilience and adaptability are testament to the strength of the human spirit – proof that no matter our childhood experiences, we have the power to shape our own future.
Wrapping up
If you’ve recognized some, or all, of these behaviors in yourself or someone else, it’s important to remember that these traits are not inherently bad or unchangeable.
They’re simply the result of a specific upbringing, and awareness is the first step towards development and growth.
As psychologist Carl Rogers once said, “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.”
Acknowledging these traits doesn’t mean you are flawed or damaged – it’s simply a part of your journey towards understanding yourself better.
Remember, being sheltered as a child may have shaped certain aspects of who you are, but it doesn’t define you.
You have within you the power to grow, learn, and adapt. Every day presents a new opportunity to evolve beyond your upbringing.
This article isn’t meant to label or judge. It’s here to shed light on the subtle ways our childhood influences our adult behavior.
Identifying one or all nine of these signs doesn’t make you or anyone else a ‘sheltered adult’. It’s merely a tool for reflection and self-understanding.
Take some time to ponder over this information. Reflect on how these behaviors may have shown up in your own life.
And remember, every step you take towards self-awareness is a step towards personal growth and a more fulfilling life.
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