Have you ever felt like you’re saying all the right words, only to sense that something about the impression you’re making is…well, off?
First of all, let me tell you that you’re not alone.
As someone who has spent years counseling clients on topics ranging from relationships to career growth, I’ve noticed a recurring challenge: people focus so much on what to say but often overlook how they’re physically presenting themselves.
And it’s a big oversight. Research suggests body language can account for up to 55% of communication. That’s huge! It means that more than half of what we say might actually come from nonverbal signals—our posture, gestures, facial expressions, and even how we walk into a room.
If you’ve ever felt that you could benefit from a little “presence boost,” you’re in the right place. Here are five body language hacks that will help you carry yourself with greater poise, calm, and authority.
01 Maintain an open posture – no crossing arms or hunching over
Here’s an interesting fact for you: research from Harvard Business School found that adopting an open, expansive stance can increase testosterone (linked to confidence) and reduce cortisol (linked to stress).
When you’re physically “open,” you’re telling your brain— and also everyone around you— that you’re relaxed, alert, and receptive.
I’ve seen clients in my counseling sessions transform their presence simply by dropping their shoulders and uncrossing their arms. This doesn’t mean you need to stand like a superhero in every conversation.
Rather, keep your chest open, your back straight, and your arms uncrossed or gently resting at your sides. You’d be surprised how much more confident and approachable you appear.
If you want proof of just how impactful this can be, look at high-profile speakers. Many, including the likes of Michelle Obama, are known for adopting open body postures during speeches. It radiates a calm confidence that pulls people in.
Plus, when you stand (or sit) tall and open, you literally give your lungs more room to breathe—leading to calmer, more controlled speech, too.
02 Keep your hands visible and use them purposefully
Ever notice how unsettling it feels when someone keeps their hands hidden? It’s almost like you can’t fully trust what they’re saying, right?
And it’s not just you or I who feel this way. According to Joe Navarro, a former FBI behavioral expert, “Those who hide their hands while speaking are perceived as less open and honest.”
And it makes sense—our hands are an extension of our communication. The lesson here?
Showing your hands while talking not only demonstrates transparency but also makes you look more dynamic and expressive. Use your hands in a way that complements your words—gentle gestures that reinforce a point or guide the listener’s attention are best.
That doesn’t mean you should flail them around wildly, of course. Subtlety is key.
03 Slow down your speaking
I’ve always been a bit of a fast talker—especially when I’m excited (or, let’s be honest, nervous!). However, over the years, I’ve realized that speaking at a hundred miles per hour doesn’t convey passion; it often projects anxiety or lack of composure.
It’s well backed up by others, too. The communication expert Bill McGowan once noted, “The more quickly we talk, the more likely we are to put people to sleep, sacrifice our credibility.”
In my own practice, I’ve found that slowing my speech forces me to choose my words more carefully. It also allows for natural pauses, giving others room to reflect on what I’ve said.
Give it a shot. The next time you’re in a conversation—especially a high-stakes one—try taking a small pause before responding. Breathe, think, and then speak.
It may feel awkward at first, but trust me, it’s a powerful way to exude calmness and poise. People will hang onto your words more, and you’ll notice them lean in rather than glaze over.
04 Mirror the movements of others
Have you ever sat across from someone and noticed you both eventually adopt the same posture? It can seem magical, but it’s actually a phenomenon known as mirroring.
And as it turns out, it can really increase respect and connection. This is backed up by experts like Professor Jack Schafer, Ph.D., who has explained that “intentionally mirroring another person’s body language promotes rapport.”
I’ve used this technique with clients who struggle in social settings. When you subtly echo the posture, gestures, or pace of someone’s speech, you’re signaling empathy and understanding.
Important note: it needs to be subtle. If they scratch their head and you do the same a second later, you’ll look like a mime. Instead, gently align your posture, or match the tone and rhythm of their speech.
05 Own your space when you walk or stand
Last but not least, how you move in and through your environment can speak volumes about your self-assurance.
If you walk with your head down and your steps hurried, you might come across as unsure or timid—even if that’s not how you feel. On the other hand, a purposeful, steady walk with your shoulders back can instantly elevate your presence.
The good news is that posture and pace can be practiced anywhere—at the grocery store, walking down the street, or strolling into a meeting. Imagine you have a string pulling you gently from the top of your head, keeping your spine aligned and your head upright. Take purposeful steps instead of small, skittery ones.
Final thoughts
At the end of the day, body language isn’t about pretending or performing. It’s about aligning your outward expression with the confident, capable person you want to be.
Whether it’s holding your head high when you walk, keeping your hands visible during a tough conversation, or slowing your speech when you feel nervous, these small changes add up to a more composed version of you.
Trust me, people pick up on how you carry yourself. And once you start making these adjustments, you’ll notice the shift in how others respond to you.
Here’s to embracing these simple hacks and showing up in the world with true class and composure!
