We all know life can throw curveballs when we least expect it.
I see it all the time in my practice as a psychologist—people come in overwhelmed by busy schedules, shifting family obligations, and never-ending to-do lists.
If you’re like most of us, you’ve probably wished you had a secret formula for staying calm when life starts to feel like one big juggling act.
And while there’s no magic wand, I have noticed that individuals who manage stress exceptionally well share a few core habits.
Today, we dig into seven of these habits and see if you can start incorporating them into your own life.
1. They understand their stress triggers
Some people think stress just sneaks up out of nowhere, but in my experience, there are always cues if you pay close attention.
It could be that subtle tightening in your shoulders when your inbox is blowing up, or that mental dread you feel every time you see your boss’s name flash on your phone.
The key is noticing these signals early, so you can respond before stress takes over.
When I work with clients, I often ask: “What patterns do you see right before you get tense?” The answers vary—some mention specific people, others point to certain times of the day, and still others notice they’re more anxious in the week leading up to payday.
Identifying these triggers doesn’t mean you’ll never feel stressed again, but it does mean you can anticipate moments of tension and prepare accordingly. It’s like seeing a speed bump coming instead of hitting it at full force.
2. They practice mindful awareness
You might have read my post on building emotional resilience, where I touched on the concept of mindfulness. But let me say it again: mindfulness is a game changer for stress management.
It’s about being fully present in the moment, rather than letting your mind race ahead to your worst-case scenario or dwell on regrets from the past.
Jon Kabat-Zinn, a pioneer in mindfulness-based stress reduction, once said, “You can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.” That quote has stayed with me for years.
As I see it, the “waves” are all those stressors in life—deadlines, family pressures, financial concerns. You can’t make them vanish. But you can ground yourself in the present moment, so that you ride the waves without drowning in them.
Personally, I like to incorporate mini mindfulness breaks throughout my day. It could be a 60-second pause to focus on my breathing or a quick body scan while my kids are (loudly) playing in the background.
Trust me on this one. Even small pockets of mindful awareness can help you stay centered and maintain emotional balance.
3. They prioritize meaningful connections
One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned, both in my own life and in my work with clients, is that stress multiplies when we isolate ourselves.
People who excel at stress management tend to have strong support systems in place.
This doesn’t mean they have dozens of close friends or are hyper-social. Rather, they have a core group—maybe just a few trusted family members or friends—who offer genuine emotional support.
Research backs this up, too. Having supportive relationships has been linked to more resistance to stress.
You don’t have to have a perfect marriage or be best friends with every neighbor on the block. It’s enough to have a couple of people who “get you”—people you can text when you’re having a meltdown or call for a quick pep talk.
4. They reframe stressful thoughts
Ever notice how stressful thoughts tend to spiral? One negative idea leads to another, and before you know it, you’re convinced everything is going wrong.
Those who handle stress well don’t magically avoid negative thinking; they catch themselves in that spiral and actively work to reframe their thoughts.
We don’t realize how much influence our own mind has over how we feel. If you walk into a tough meeting thinking, “I’m doomed,” you’re more likely to shut down mentally. Instead, try a reframe: “This will be challenging, but I can handle it.” That slight shift changes your emotional landscape, making stress a challenge you can work through rather than a catastrophe that swallows you whole.
It’s not about forced optimism or pretending life is a constant joyride. It’s simply about reminding yourself that you’re capable, that difficulties are temporary, and that you do have tools to cope.
5. They embrace small, restorative rituals
Stress masters—yes, I like calling them that—are big on having routines or rituals that ground them.
For some, it’s that morning cup of tea before the day’s chaos begins. For others, it’s a quick workout or a 10-minute journaling session right before bed. The point is to find something that consistently resets your mind and body.
I like to do yoga in the evenings. I’m not perfect at it—I still wobble during half the poses—but there’s something about taking that time to focus on my breath and stretch out the tensions of the day that leaves me more relaxed.
When I come back to my living room (usually to the sight of my kids building sofa forts), I feel calmer and more present.
Now, you don’t have to do yoga. Maybe it’s painting, listening to music, or taking a short walk. The important thing is that it’s something you do regularly, so your brain comes to recognize it as a signal to slow down and shift gears.
6. They set realistic boundaries
Let’s face it: we can’t do everything, especially if we want to manage our stress in a healthy way.
High-functioning people who handle stress well often have one major thing going for them: they’re not shy about saying “no” or delegating tasks. This includes boundaries at work, boundaries in friendships, and even boundaries with themselves (like resisting the urge to check work emails at midnight).
There’s a quote from Brené Brown that I’m particularly fond of:
“Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others.”
Saying “no” might feel uncomfortable at first—trust me, I’ve been there—but it’s necessary to protect your well-being.
You can’t pour from an empty cup, and you certainly can’t manage stress effectively if you’re overloaded with tasks or demands that don’t align with your priorities.
7. They keep perspective on life’s bigger picture
Finally, people who’ve nailed stress management tend to keep a broader perspective on what truly matters.
I’ve seen clients who get so wrapped up in small daily annoyances that they lose sight of the bigger picture: their health, their relationships, and what really brings them joy.
In my own life, raising two kids while juggling a career has taught me a lot about perspective. I’m the type who used to freak out if dinner wasn’t on the table by 6 p.m.
But over time, I realized that, in the grand scheme of things, it’s not as critical as I made it out to be. Some nights, we order takeout and share a laugh about it.
My children aren’t going to remember what time dinner was served; they’ll remember that we spent time together enjoying a meal (even if it arrived in a cardboard box).
The bottom line
Stress is an inevitable part of life—we all know that. But that doesn’t mean you have to live in a perpetual state of tension.
By adopting even a few of these habits—like spotting your stress triggers, practicing mindfulness, or setting firmer boundaries—you’ll be well on your way to feeling more at ease.
You’ve got this. And if you need further support, don’t hesitate to reach out to a mental health professional or someone you trust.
